So, I'm at Dad's now. Pretty cool, actually. I have my mp3 player, so it's all good.. brought a few DVD's... Yep. Yesterday actually wasn't too bad, Me, Vicky and then me and Kevin we're working, so it was cool. I just wanna say, Kevin screaming "YOU CAN'T PARK THERE!!" Was funny.

Last night, Whenever I turned off the light, Meaghan sat straight up in bed and I told her to go back to sleep, coz I just turned off the light, and then we talked for a bit.. I thought something was funny because of the fact she said "It'd be funny to see.. kraft dinner", And didn't understand why I found that halarious.

It turns out she was actually sleeping when she said that.

I wish I had something to say musically, But I don't really to much. Listening to a bit of Pilate lately. Which is awesome.

Hah. I can't think of anything else to say.

I keep listening to the song 'A Kind Of Hope' by Pilate. There's one line that catches my ears. I'm trying to figure out the lyrics.

"I'm waiting for the moment/When the night becomes kind/There's a shadow creeping through here"

On another note, On sonmeanings everyone agreed that the song 'Generation X-Wing' by Matthew Good Band is about a guy who realizes he's a loser, but just doesn't care anymore. But I think I wrote about that before.

Have you ever thought about what it would be like if you just up and disappeared? What all your family and friends would think, How it would affect them. Would life just go on, without a difference if you were gone? Or would it have a large effect on someone, effect enough for them to change something. Anything. About they are as a person. Themselves, How they act towards others, how they think as a person. Wnhat if you were gone away from just one person - Say you were friends, then there was a rift and you drifted apart. What effect would that have on the people involved? Would it change them, Would they regret it? Would they learn the lesson they were meant to?

Think about it. What effect do you have on every person you come into contatc with everydat means - What you mean to them, How your actions effect them. Or how people you see everyday, how there actions effect you.

Don't you think you should do something about that? Change something. Anything that isn't right, There is a solution. Someone who Makes you feel bad - Stop speaking to them. Don't be mean about it, Just don't bother. What effect does it have on them? Do they not care? If they don't, then it wasn't really worth your time for the whole time, was it?

What if they do notice, Say something to you. Then you continue on, Because they meant well. Anything can be fixed, You just realize - Anything bad that has come upon you was possibly your own fault.

Read this.
Inspired slightly by..
I must point out:

"You’re sitting at home one sunny afternoon bored senseless when a friend pops by to say hello. And while you’re sitting there, making small talk, they ask you if you want to do some Crack. Being that you’re bored, and known for being an impulsive moron, you agree. And that’s how it starts. You know it’s a stupid thing to be doing, and you know that it’s just going to end up turning your life to s**t, but you just can’t seem to put the pipe down.

Years pass, and your love of Crack’s sweet ecstasy continues. You become oblivious to the fact that your life has become a prison, that you have slowly isolated yourself from your family, lost your friends, and squandered bricks of cash. It’s worth it, you tell yourself, because sweet Lady Crack will never let you down.

And then, one day, you wake up and find yourself laying in the middle of an empty apartment, in tattered clothes, with a splitting headache. You reach for your trusty pipe and some rock when you realize that it’s gone, vanished along with everything else. And at that terrifying moment, while you struggle to focus and force back the vomit surging up your throat, you realize that Crack has cost you more than just your money, your sanity, and your heart. You realize that it was you, all along, that kept putting that pipe to your lips when you should have been trying to get as far away from it as humanly possible. In the end, it was you that refused to realize that no matter how fantastic Crack makes you feel – it’s still Crack. It’s designed to f**k you over from the very beginning."


Just some thoughts for tonight.

Edited to add:
Think about This too.

The road seen beneath the van’s headlights,
It’s cold so cold, cold enough to feel your sigh
My face up against the window now, don’t you know it’s cold outside,
Pick up your life as I pass by, can’t you see I’m cold inside
We were poor but we had something,
What wasn’t poor was poisoned by your fear,
You wanted more, I gave you nothing,
I may be blind...
Each town, each town it seems the same my dear,
It’s loud tonight, your heart is ringing in my ear
Walk out the door across the street, don’t you know it’s cold outside,
Pick up the phone my signal’s weak, can’t you see I’m cold inside
I think you know...
We were poor but we had something,
What wasn’t torn was poisoned by your fear,
You wanted more, I gave you nothing,
I may be blind for I never saw your tears
I think you know...
We were poor but we had something,
What wasn’t torn was poisoned by your fear,
You wanted more, I gave you nothing,
I may be blind for I never saw your tears,
As days pass by the gap it now appears,
When I come home please say that you’ll be there...

Pilate - The Travel Song

I went out and hung out with Becky, Sara and Matt. It was interesting.

Yep.

I keep listening to this song...

Oh no I've said too much
I set it up
That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

And "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana.

Mom and Dad are going away again this week. I might be going and doing.. something (Dunno what yet) With a whole bunch of people, So that should be fun.

Nirvana - Come As You Are
Matthew Good Band - Carmelina
Matthew Good - Generation X-Wing
The Shins - New Slang
Garbage - Only Happy when It Rains
Tonic - If You Could Only See
The Libertines - Death On The Stairs

Slightly obsessed with this songs.. Right this minute

80% of this weekend I was happy. wow.

I went to the EX on Friday and that was fun...

And I just downloaded the Garden State soundtrack and I love it. That was an awesome movie.

Currently listening to the song "Giant" by Matthew Good Band. Shawn tells me he doesn't like them, But I don't particularly care, As there's stuff he listens to that I don't particulaly like either. For Giant in particular, my favorite lines are.. "The better happier you, A better happier you.." "And we carry on like it's easy, Like your all out, and I'm your man, Baby, I'm your man." I just like the way he sings it...

Tomorrow is the trip. Should be fun, We'll see our cousin Ryan who I haven't met before. Apperantly he's tall, and he's bringing along his fiance. Oh la la. And i plan to go to some form of a CD store to see if I can find any Libertines CD's. Took too long to buy them, and since I get paid tomorrow, I'm spending the money on them.

I worked 10 hours yesterday too, I didn't take a break for the first 8 hours, so I nearly fell over at that point. Though, Right before I took my break there was a guy in who was halarious and I was just chatting with him and.. yeah. We talked about if it was real lobster, about them selling the subway stamp cards on ebay and stuff like that. WAs pretty interesting. He had brown eyes. Nice.

Today.. hmm.. I can't remember too to much of it, though I tried the burbon chicken and it was hot... my mouth was burning and stuff. fun. And Jeremie, Corey and Matt and some other guy I don't know were in, coz they were working for Jeremie's landskaping company and.. yeah. It was great.

And then Meaghan told me when I came home that this super, super (Like reallyohmygoddiesonthefloor) hot guy we saw last week rang in the groceries. the joke was we were like 'mmm, cake...' coz this magazine had cake on it, and we were looking at him,. and yeah... anyways.. after she told me that I just went "I LOVE CAKE!" and it was great.

And there were things I was gonna try and do, and I did, and it worked out and... I dunno. It's how I act.

Oh, and yesterday since I worked the whole 10 hours, I went to the CD store right after and bought a CD. I wanted to get Matthew Good Band 'The Audio Of Being' (As that has Carmelina on it, and it;s stuck in my head...), except they didn't have it, so I got The Clash's "London Calling" which is great..

Why do I keep saying "That's great" or "it was great.."?

I was just watching a Matthew Good Band video on mom's computer.. It was cool. for the song "Apparations", The video's just.. neat.

Though don't watch it if you have a problem with watching a prostitute, someone snorting cocaine and someone dying. I remember seeing the video when I was younger, It just didn't click until now.. "ohhh, so THAT's what he's doing in the bathroom stall..."

Anyways. Linkage to the video. To me it's thought provoking, but whatever. All of Matthew Good/Band's I've seen were thought provoking, Except maybe Carmelina. Though I love that song. It's funny, Youtube is my friend so when I go on there and look for music videos, Like Matthew Good Band ones, I can recall seeing them when I was little. Like Apparations, Anti-Pop, Weapon and... there was another but I forgot. Oh well.

I've also been buying quite a few used CD's lately too, In the space of 2 days (Tuesday and Wednesday) I bought 6, Which isn't too bad for 25 bucks. There all very.. soft rock, I'll say. Mainstream. Not like how I want to buy the two Libertines albums, More Radiohead, The Clash and The Stills. But I'd never be able to find those used here. Oh well.

Becky's sister passed away this week, Which was really sad. I went to the visitation yesterday and.. yeah.. it was hard being there. I did cry just a bit though, Someone who I won't name was bawling his eyes out. And it was kinda funny, coz Becky was going "oh, it'll be alright..." when it should have been the other way 'round. I can't go to the funeral though coz I have to work, which made me kinda mad.

"No, you've got it the wrong way 'round, You kicked me out and blamed it on the brown..."

Got that song stuck in my head now. Crap. I love Pete's voice too (Though I love Carl's too...) so whatever. And the thing from the video for WEapon keeps running through my head, especially the second 'letter' to Pat. Except I can't remember it all, so last night It was running through my head but I didn't remember it all and it was driving me nuts. Ohhh well. Annnd this weekend I have to work alot... not past six though and the earliest is 9, I think. Not too to bad. I remember on Tuesday I was really angry and Brent kept asking me if I was on the tired brigade again... Ahhh... yeah. Whatever. I also have been realizing how I don't spend enough time with people that I'm friends with to any degree, So that kinda sucks.